Sooooooooooo.....it's been a wile,how are all you doing?
Let's see...where should I start from...maybe from where I left you.
So my sister and her family visited and I had the chance to spend some time with them,get to know my sweet new baby nephew(he's pure chubby gorgeousness) but most of all I was my niece hostage
It's amazing how much she grew from august,when I visited them this summer she talked and talked and talked but too often it was hard to understan,now everithing she says is understandable...and she never ever shut up,a constant "unt unt unt,what's this,chocolate,play,run,hide,coca cola,come"....we're still looking for her batteries to turn her off every now and than but with no luck
As nice as it was to have them here it was total chaos considering also all the pets and the fact that Asia was on heat so we had to keep the 2 males separated or they'd fight and Asia had an infection so kept peeing inside...open door close door be carfeul clean the floor exc.I didn't open DA at all since the only time I had for myself was during my niece evening nap and at night,wich I dedicated to daily trips to the vet (and I'll explain why in a bit)and painting.I ended up beign very tired and lost a lot of sleep,not that I ever sleep enough or well but it got worse.When they left I was sorry but relieved too,it'sd hard not beign able to see them when you want to but one more week like that wuold have been too much,this goes for me and my mother cause they enjoied their holiday letting us take care of Andrea,having nothing to do exc wich was right,it was their holiday.
During this time I noticed one of my cat was having trouble eating so I took him to the vet and she told me his mouth was really messed up,he had just a couple of teeth left and they were kept on by tartar and his gums were in owful condition so eating was painful for him.My Cleo was almost 20 years old but his mind was still "fresh"...his body sadly was failing him.He was a little heroic amazing cat...at the end of summer he suddenly got blind,he wuoldn't eat and just spend all of his time in a corner down in the garden,I was sure he was about to die but 2days time,some cure and love and he not only adjusted to blindness but got back to his usual self.Anyway....I brought him in daily for antibiotics hoping his gums wuold get better and it was working.We got him his favourite food and he was eating again but it didn't last long.
In the meantime the day my sister left I noticed that another one of my cats wasn't too well,Peppiniello the blind cat.The poor thing didn't understand a thing while my sister was here,he didn't have his space anymore,he cuold hear all those noises didn't know where to go so at some point he went out on a chair on the balcony and spent his time there.The saturday they left and the house was peacful I broughthim in for his dinner and noticed he had a very swollen and hard tummy,I checked if the wet was still open but it wasn't.
He too didn't eat too much that night and even less the day after so on monday I brought both cats in.Peppiniello this summer had some breathing problems and I was told he had an heart condition wich,even if we cured him at the time wuold give him problems in the future so the vet wanted the other vet who cured him this summer to check him and he's not in on mondays,as for Cleo she said that if the antibiotics didn't have effect and he abandoned food there was not much else we cuold do
We tried everyhing with Cleo even feeding him with a siringe but he scratched me using those few energies he had left.We tried them all but in the end had to give up and letnature take its course.
When I brought Peppiniello in on tusday Pino did an ultrasound to his tummy and heart,he told me the situation was critical,to give him some injections and bring him back in in 3 days...so ok it was critical but saying to bring him back in 3 days sure didn't prepare me to lose him the day after.
On wensday he got worse so quickly I cuoldn't belive it,by 15:00 he was lying and having spasms...heartbreaking! I run to the vet and he told him to try another injection by 8 (the injections were for making him pee and free his tummy from all the liquid) but by 5 he was dead. My sweet Peppiniello was dead,just like that....all of a sudden....and we felt guilty cause maybe if we had noticed before,if the house hadn't been so chaotic...maybe....or maybe not.
When we went to bury him at night...I had to obviously cause all the nasty things are up to me when it comes to our pets...it was so painful to cover his face with ground...I just cuoldn't belive that I was buring him...no more sweet cuddly amazing Peppiniello,and I knew that soon I wuold be buring Cleo too.
Cleo died on friday,peacfully in his sleep wich I'm greatful for,he's the first cat I lose in a peacful way.It was sad to know that he was dying cause his body failed him,that we cuoldn't do anything for him,but it was comforting to know that he lived a long life and was dying of old age (even though he was dying cause he wasn't eating but it was impossible for him to eat cause of his old body)
He spent his last days sleeping,we made him compfy....I brushed him wich he loved...when I buried him it looked like he was sleeping.
So I lost 2 of my kitties in less than a week and if you know me a little you know how heartbreaking that was....I miss them they were both amazing cats for different reasons
Piccolo (the red one)was left without his best friend (Peppiniello) so I let him "move" to my room where he can be close to Morfeo and Mappina.
Artwise I started a new painting right away...a commission.My unt gave me the pic of the daughter of a friend of hers,she wants to see if she can help me and having she connections with people with money I'm doing it,maybe I'll get me some portrait commissions....but I'm so not into it! First of all...this child...she is "the perfect little girl"...golden curls....blue eyes...but she looks so annoied...old.I started it but had to start it again cause the paper I used the first time wasn't good enough,this one it's not the best eighter but I did Flamenco on it so I should manage....but I'm having troubles....I'm so hating it,I so wanted to do somenthing else!Also I need that time in between paintings...you know...the "happy mourning" and than the "thinking about the next,deciding,searching" time and the "anxiety excitment starting a new one" time. But no,I removed the last one from the easel and started this right away and I have no feelings for it....just the hope of getting some commissions....wich if I do will be doing things I don't really want to do....if only this child looked like an happy child.Also my unt...she gave me 2 photos 1 week before Christmas and expected me to do the paintings so she cuold give them as Christmas presents
and I even told her I had to finish what I was doing before starting....I mean...do people think that we have magic wands???!!! Do they think that because it looks like a photo it takes a click to do? So damn frustrating!
DAwise...when I opened it after my sis left I had almost 1000 deviations to check and almost 800 messages
....and no will to check them so I closed it.
I have to say that amount of deviations was due to the fact that I was watching the painters club but after realizing that they send you so many deviations and I ended up faving about 10 I'm not anymore!
I spent an evening checking deviations getting them to about 400,I spent another evening replying to comments and took care of almost all of them...I though I was almost back to normal,to that point where I can happily reply and leave comments without having to spend the whole evening in front of this screen when BAM I got a DD...and you know what that means...I know have 1584 messages and 558 devations.I know I don't necessarily have to reply but I want to so I will...not today though!
As for the DD....I guess I'm "one of those" I was talking about in a previous journal,you know...the usual suspects who always get them
Not that I think I don't deserve it (even though I think the photo I took didn't and BTW I took better ones) but so do a lot of other,especially now that I noticed there are more daily DD...more attention to traditional wuold be nice.
I though that if I'd get another DD it wuold have been with "Cause of death"....it contains blood and boobs and that seems to be the winning combination
Anyway thanks to the suggester and featurer but I'll do it personally later.
Sooooooooooo....enough for today (if you're still reading)I just wanted to let you know where I am at the moment...tired,a little sad,uninspired,looking for feelings emotions and energies from within...but still alive and loving you my dear DA friends